DeBoni Family + Graduation Gown = Weekend Celebration

- Jake & Nathaniel man nurse style -

- I cherish this picture of Marea, Jake & Grandma-

-Nathaniel, Marea, Jake & I-

-the little one was full of active excitement during the graduation ceremony-

-Jake & Jason-

-it was wonderful to spend the weekend with Grandma and catch sweet moments like these-

-Jake + Parents-

-From prerequisite buddies to grad friends + 2 amazing spouses-

-Larry, Jason, Grandma and Beth waiting for the ceremony to begin-

-"bros first" as Jake would say. Nathaniel, Chris, Jake and Peter-

-Jake and his handmade cedar nursing pin-

-DeBoni family on a Sunday morning walk-

Photos!

A couple of photos from recent weeks:

Two weekends ago we had a wonderful visit from our good friends Cory (who just received some MAJOR awards!) and Sarah (who is MAJORLY awesome!).

Putting the boys to work in preparation for a work-related field-trip.

That very same weekend we were able to escape into the woods of Wisconsin (stop the snickering) with some good friends.

The following weekend we were gifted with being able to host our wonderful friend (yes, it's evident that we have a lot of wonderful & good good friends), Rach.

As part of our weekend we delighted in being able to celebrate the union between Amy & Chris. Such a beautiful wedding and simple celebration of love.

(L-R: me, Rebecca {who just agreed to be our birth advocate/friend at the time of delivery}, Amy, Rachel & Jessi {who is due with her first child mid-June!})

I am a little obsessed with this little one and yes, we dance together often.

Time together before the wedding.

The following afternoon Jason joined us for a day downtown. It was such a gift to welcome him into our day of rest to simply be with. Thanks Jason for joining us - we loved having you!

Growing Heart

In January as my mom was in the beginning stages of cleaning out her classroom as she prepares for retirement she came across the following quote she later passed my way:

Making a decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. (Elizabeth Stone)

Back in January my body hadn't changed too much at that time - clothes were fitting tighter, aversions to certain foods were stronger. But this idea of forever having my heart walk outside of my body was an idea, a philosophy, a thought of "really?" as I read over and through this quote time after time, not able to truly grasp what Elizabeth could be intending to convey/communicate about her ideas of motherhood/parenting.

In February I began wearing maternity clothing. February 20th I felt our child move inside for the first time as I laid in bed beside my Beloved, waking to a home filled with friends - experiencing new life.

In March I began wearing form fitting shirts. My breasts were (and still are) growing, my belly expanding, my hips adjusting. Evidence was growing that our lives were changing, my heart was supporting another, my choices were impacting another, my lungs were bringing new life to another and my body was growing into a haven for another life.

In April our little one began dancing. Naturally, we began a new routine to our morning and evening together of listening to this new life with our hands, hearts, and laughter in the midst of the miracle maturing in this body.

A month ago this morning I shared with my Board of Directors that following the birth of our child I will not be returning to my position. A week later we sold my motorcycle and began packing our apartment into boxes - preparing to move to a place where we can rest and call home.

Three weeks back as Jake & I were laying on the couch, listening to each other, communicating with one another our feelings related to these slow & steady changes our little one began to dance. With instinct I lifted my shirt and we watched for the first time our child move within. My skin adapted, my shape manipulated, my spirit connected and although I have always known that a love for our child would come - as we laid on the cough that evening as a family I could not help but wonder what we would continue to grow and look like as our heart began to grow into something greater than the two of us combined.

Our heart continues to grow, able to experience our spirits and listen to our voices, developing the skills needed to walk around outside of our bodies, experience the world on his/her own terms and listen to the small voice of love growing inside.

This morning our little one woke me with a jab to my lower right abdomen. He/She is thriving as we continue to celebrate, wonder, grieve and celebrate over and with this new life preparing itself for love and life on behalf of others and within.

Our heart is growing & learning as we look forward to cherishing and protecting committed moments such as these together.

Week 25

A morning @ the conservatory & one active little one:

Gettin' Bigger & Better

- thank you TW200 for two years of memories. I'll miss you. -

- thank you Spring for making me feel better -

- thank you Bleeding Heart Bakery for making me bigger -

I am a pretty visual guy. I am also a numbers guy. Last week while I was sitting in a clinic waiting to see a patient I had with me a growth chart for fetal weight while still in utero. The idea is that you look up your weeks along in pregnancy and reference it to a chart that tells you approximately how much the fetus should weigh, how long it is, and a few other vital statistics. Just looking at the numbers I could tell there was a great curve, but I just had to plot it out to see it.

So here it is. Below is a chart that plots weight in lbs. over weeks in the pregnancy.


It is a rather logarithmic curve, not a linear one, and as would be expected, near the beginning of the pregnancy the fetus weighs almost nothing. In fact, it weighs less than a pound until around week 23 out of 40. But somewhere around week 25 to 27, the weight just explodes, the gain accelerates and takes off; the very nature of a logarithmic curve.

In the version below, I think you can guess where Jess is on the graph.



So, being the amazing husband that I am, I pointed this out to her. I will let you guess what her reaction was.

Get ready.

Copyright© 2007 by Maureen Shaughnessy

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees

For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body

love what it loves.

Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain

are moving across the landscapes,

over the prairies and the deep trees,

the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,

are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,

the world offers itself to your imagination,

calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting --

over and over announcing your place

in the family of things.

- Mary Oliver

Phenomenal Woman

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Maya Angelou

Nine days ago, a student in my doula course brought me a beautiful bouquet of white lilies which I put into a vase full of water. I pointed out to the doulas that some of the flowers had "fully dilated" and were displaying their exuberant female genitalia while others were closed up tight or just a fingertip dilated. I asked the students what they thought might happen if I "helped" the closed ones to open a bit by manipulating the delicate petals. They were horrified at the thought, of course, and were completely confident that the flowers would work things out on their own.

The flowers were left to themselves and gave off a lovely aroma to those who came in and out of the office through the week. On the fifth day that they were in my care, they served as a model for a midwifery course on the vulva, vagina and cervix. Still a few of these flowers seemed to be stuck in "failure to progress". They were unyielding and refusing to open.

This morning I went into the office and noticed that some of the lilies had turned brown. These were the early bloomers and, as I picked them off and discarded them, I noticed that every single blossom had fully and perfectly bloomed. The office had been closed for three days. The bouquet of lilies had been alone, dark and unassisted and all had bloomed into full beauty and splendor. They had only received one big drink of water when I originally put them into the vase.

These flowers are such a beautiful metaphor for having faith in the perfection of birth.

Gloria Lemay, Vancouver

I think I've found the song for the next five months.

Love, Love, Love...

IN THE BEGINNING

In the morning when Eve and Adam
woke to snow and their minds,
they set out in marvelous clothes
hand in hand under the trees.

Endlessly precision met them,
until they went grinning in time
with no word for their close
escape from that warm monotony.


- Jack Gilbert

She started to sing. "'Keep the home fires burning,'" she sang in a thin, reedy voice, and slowly the others joined her. As I walked toward the lodge they began other songs, going quickly after a few bars from one to the next. They sang of wars they never fought, of losses they have never sustained. They were singing, forgetting the words, appropriating the harmony for themselves, convinced of a heroic desolation, toasting their sadness in the big campfire like another marshmallow. "'It's a long way, '" they sang, "'to Tipperary.'" It is indeed, I thought.

Congo

Orphaned, Raped and Ignored

By NICHOLAS D. KRISTOF

Published: January 31, 2010

"Sometimes I wish eastern Congo could suffer an earthquake or a tsunami, so that it might finally get the attention it needs. The barbaric civil war being waged here is the most lethal conflict since World War II and has claimed at least 30 times as many lives as the Haiti earthquake."

Take a look. Really. I'm personally grateful and overwhelmed with gratitude which the media, grassroots groups and various NPO have put forth to address the on-going concerns post earthquake in Haiti. But where was I when Haiti, the most poverty stricken country in Western Hemisphere, was simply a country of poverty?

Where will I be when Congo gets hit by a natural disaster, or even worse, a disaster induced by men? Will I be living there to address the needs of the community or will I simply send money, post things on facebook, watch celebrity pledge drives because it's sexy and the right thing to do. It's the current cause and that has to be okay because it's also the right thing to do - to respond with love, attention and tangible assistance.

This article has encouraged/challenged/convicted me that sometimes enough is simply just not enough.

More excerpts:

A displaced family near Kalehe, eastern Congo. The area has been suffering for a dozen years from a brutal and complex civil war. More than one million people were displaced by fighting there in 2009 alone, according to the United Nations.

Utukufu Nabuziralo is homeless and, perhaps, a widow. Rebels attacked and burned her village in November, she said, and killed five people in front of her. Then the rebels led her husband into the forest, and she didn't know if he was still alive. At one point, Utukufu said she had been raped, but at another she said she had been only beaten. She is holding her baby, Chiza.

so i have this beautiful cousin.

so i have this beautiful cousin who does beautiful things in the world to make the world a little... well, a little more beautiful. you can follow her work on the Harambee Arts Blog or at real deal web-site: Harambee Arts.





In case you need a quick synopsis before you head on over to their web-site, we have one for you!

Harambee Arts: Let's Pull Together partners with African grassroots programs to train local caregivers to provide art programs for vulnerable children in an environment that fosters their sense of joy, creativity and exuberance. Through its arts programs, Harambee Arts strives to promote the well-being of homeless, orphaned and other neglected children, enhance the stability of their families and support systems, and develop their sense of self-worth and positive personal ethics by creating opportunities for children to help other children.

Really, you should trust us on this one - take time and check it out: Harambee Arts

Hand & Cloth

if you're looking to give a most beautiful gift for a most wonderful occasion or to a most wonderful personwe really strongly suggest you consider visiting Hand and Cloth and purchasing one of their handmade throws.


Some quick facts about how amazing of an organization this is:

our mission
Through creative enterprise and the transforming love of Jesus Christ, we seek to empower women to begin new lives.

our work
Hand and Cloth works holistically with young women from Calcutta (Kolkata), India to address their needs as they seek to begin new lives outside of red-light areas. One of our starting points is to provide alternative employment. Using the kantha stitch, the young women create kantha dorokha, a traditional two-sided quilt made from recycled sari material. These kantha throws are then sold in the United States. Hand and Cloth provides school fees and tutors for the young women and also offers regular Bible studies.

our vision
Old Testament writers used the Hebrew word רפא (rapha) to refer to healing, especially divine healing. More literally, rapha means to sew together or to stitch. And so our name, Hand and Cloth, is an image not only of the creative work these women are doing, but also of the creative, healing work God is doing in their lives. As each product is handmade by a woman, our hope is that she would come to know that she is handmade by God.

Really, think about it. Great people are doing great things for great people and it would be an honor for you to join this circle of love.

Charter for Compassion



Charter for Compassion

The principle of compassion lies at the heart of all religious, ethical and spiritual traditions, calling us always to treat all others as we wish to be treated ourselves. Compassion impels us to work tirelessly to alleviate the suffering of our fellow creatures, to dethrone ourselves from the centre of our world and put another there, and to honour the inviolable sanctity of every single human being, treating everybody, without exception, with absolute justice, equity and respect.

It is also necessary in both public and private life to refrain consistently and empathically from inflicting pain. To act or speak violently out of spite, chauvinism, or self-interest, to impoverish, exploit or deny basic rights to anybody, and to incite hatred by denigrating others—even our enemies—is a denial of our common humanity. We acknowledge that we have failed to live compassionately and that some have even increased the sum of human misery in the name of religion.

We therefore call upon all men and women ~ to restore compassion to the centre of morality and religion ~ to return to the ancient principle that any interpretation of scripture that breeds violence, hatred or disdain is illegitimate ~ to ensure that youth are given accurate and respectful information about other traditions, religions and cultures ~ to encourage a positive appreciation of cultural and religious diversity ~ to cultivate an informed empathy with the suffering of all human beings—even those regarded as enemies.

We urgently need to make compassion a clear, luminous and dynamic force in our polarized world. Rooted in a principled determination to transcend selfishness, compassion can break down political, dogmatic, ideological and religious boundaries. Born of our deep interdependence, compassion is essential to human relationships and to a fulfilled humanity. It is the path to enlightenment, and indispensible to the creation of a just economy and a peaceful global community.

http://charterforcompassion.org/

Home Again.

After a most wonderful two week road trip we're back in the saddle again and into the daily routines of life. More later - but in the meantime, here are a couple of pictures from our adventures (not necessarily in order).

Twin Falls, ID

Somewhere in our travels in Idaho.

Devil's Tower, WY

I just love this shot - good ole' wildlife breaking the barriers in WY.

Jake @ the Badlands in SD.

New Year's Eve with our homies in the Springs.

Tina and Superman (in disguise).

Scrambling has to be one of our favorite activities.

Horse-thieves, all of them!

Knee-deep in luscious mountain style love.